Hooked On Phonics Didn’t Work For Fantasia!
September 30th, 2005 
Entertainment
Third season American Idol Winner Fantasia Barrino has managed to make it this far in life without the ability to functionally read or write, adding to her not so amazing singing ability.
In her upcoming book, “Life Isn’t Don’t Be No Fairry Tail” transcribed by a white man and 3 blind monkeys, she reveals this information. She also reveals her mom can’t read good and stuff either.
There is no word on whether she plans to expand on the scale model of “Derek Zoolander’s School For Kids Who Can’t Read Good and Who Can’t Do Other Stuff Good Either”.
She states that she managed to get as far as she has in life by hiding her poor pronunciation of words behind her “country” roots.
This news comes to the chagrin of countless fans of music who have held hate signs at her concerts, seeing as she can’t read them anyway.
Originally posted on MTV.com
September 30th, 2005 at 2:57 pm
LMAOOOO nigga you’re cold! but thank god you saved your butt cuz u know what i was gonna do if u didnt post this!
September 30th, 2005 at 3:09 pm
gotdamn lol
i cant believe she cant read… she does have a bubba gumpish look to her tho…
September 30th, 2005 at 3:15 pm
bubba gump??? oh shit *DEAD* like i said onthe boards, this explains so much. she cant read her own damn lyrics, which is why she moans n groans her way thru all her damn songs to make up for it.
“baby i mmmmannnnnaaahhhhhehhhhhhhhhhh for youuuu”
September 30th, 2005 at 5:58 pm
!!!!!!
October 4th, 2005 at 9:41 am
OMFG.
not ZOOLANDER, though!
that just KILTED me. no bullshit.